Three Syllables, Eight Letters

I absolutely melt when he looks into my eyes and tells me he loves me.

Getting Ahead of Myself?

I regularly frequent wedding blogs, photography sites, etc to get ideas for my wedding... even though I have no ring yet.  I've decided on some things I want/don't want, things I want to try to do myself, and realized I still have no idea what I want in certain cases.  

I wonder sometimes if it's bad to throw myself into it when we haven't even made that jump yet.  Just hope I'm not setting myself up for disappointment.

In the Middle of the Night

The Boy and I sleep in the same bed an average of 4 nights per week.  He has a full-size bed (I know) with no head/foot board.  I have a queen size bed with both.  On nights we do sleep over, one or both of us inevitably doesn't sleep well.

I'm a cover stealer.  He's a sprawler.  I'm a light sleeper.  He turns a lot.  He rarely snores though, so that's good at least.  He likes to make note of the times when I'm falling asleep and do one of those weird muscle spasm things.  Last night, I woke up to him shaking me asking if I was alright.  Apparently, I started moaning in my sleep, and he thought I was dying.  I'm guessing I was in the middle of a dream.  I was definitely in a deep sleep came to confused and groggy assuring The Boy that I was in fact ok and he could go back to sleep.

So I wonder... does it get better?  Will we eventually get used to the other one next to us, or are we going to need to resort to buying a king sized bed?  

The Premise

I'm a 23 year-old professional living in DC.  I take my work seriously.  I take my relationship seriously.  Oh yeah...

Allow me to introduce The Boy: a 26 year-old professional also living in DC.  We've been dating for nearly 10 months now.  It was a relationship that both of us were hesitant to enter because we were good friends prior to dating and were afraid that it just wouldn't work.  (Not to mention we have a plethora of the same friends and a break-up would be really messy.)  Mid-January, I gave him an ultimatum: I wasn't going to continue our friends-with-benefits relationship because I was getting too attached.  His response, "Let's do it." (Start dating that is.)  It's been a wild ride since.

The Boy had a well-known reputation for being a bit of a player.  After being hurt before, I was afraid I was only going to be a brief dalliance in his life.  But I also knew something else - he was hesitant to enter any dating relationship, and it was therefore a big deal for him.  I, myself, have not have the best track record as it pertains to faithfulness.  Thus far, he is the only one I've ever dated that I haven't cheated on.  I intend to keep it that way.

While attending a friend's wedding four months into our relationship, the first Big Step happened.  We were laying in bed when The Boy turned to me and said, "This will probably be us someday."  Proceed a strange mix of emotions inside my head ranging from excitement to confusion.  A few minutes later he turns to me again and says "So, if we got married in a few years, would you still want to wait until you're 30 to have kids?"  This came from a conversation I'd had with a friend the day before while in The Boy's presence.  I asked that we put that question on hold and come back to it at a later date.

The second Big Step came not long after the first.  We were out at a bar with friends.  I got a little jealous for no reason over him dancing with a friend.  As we're talking through it, he says "I can't believe you're jealous of her.  I'm falling in love with you."  

The first actual "I love you" was spoken by yours truly while I thought The Boy was asleep.  He was not, heard me, and called me out on it.  A few weeks later, he said it to me after we'd been out drinking.  I told him he wouldn't remember it in the morning.  When we woke up, he looked at me and said "I remember.  And I do love you."

The Boy has a tendency to not show his emotions.  He doesn't say too often what's really going through his head, but every now and then he drops these little bombshells on me.  The day when I knew we were really serious came in August while visiting a friend in Pennsylvania.  We were talking about our relationship and the subject migrated to engagement.  He said, "I know now I want to marry you.  I'm just waiting till after our 1 year anniversary out of principle."  Me: Giggle, smile, swoon.

I'm so in love.  Not to say that our relationship is perfect - far from it.  He has trouble being sensitive to my sometimes fragile feelings, and I avoid bringing up things that are bothering me to the point where they become real problems.  But we're working through it, and hopefully sometime in the not-too-distant future I'll be the Future Mrs. Boy.

Check back for updates.  I hope to include candid insight into our very real relationship and the funny stuff that goes on in the mean-time.